Learning to Abide in His Love

Learning to Abide in His Love

It has been a rough past couple of months. My weakness have been exposed, lies have been used against me, and the worst part is, in these moments I couldn't see the truth of His promises. The only word I can use to even remotely describe the place I was in is dark. An inexplainable darkness.

It is the scariest place I have ever been.

When I finally got the courage to talk about it, someone very dear to me pointed out that I was a target in spiritual warfare. I wasn't crazy, I was being attacked. That was the point that I realized the magnitude of what I am about to do. I'm about to go to a dark place to be a light and share God's love and Power. Satan doesn't want me going to Haiti to love on those kids, nannies, missionaries, and community. So, he finds my insecurities, my weaknesses, and he uses them against me. And

 I was allowing myself to fall for his lies.

Unsure of how to combat the darkness, I was guided to the book of John chapter 14. I started reading and underlining verses that applied directly to the problem I was facing. Like verse 17 which reads, "even the Spirit of truth, whom the world cannot receive, because it neither sees him nor knows him. You know him, for he dwells with you and will be in you". The first lie I fell for was immediately discredited. I am not alone. And verse 27, "Peace I leave with you: my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give to you. Let not your hearts be troubled, neither let them be afraid". I have nothing to fear. 

Then I read John 15 and 16. "Abide in my love... these things I have spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full" John 15:9 and 11. That joy I had been longing for was waiting for me. All I have to do is abide in His love. So, I will Abide in His love.  John 16:33, "In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world". Be Fearless in Him. I have nothing to fear because I am in God and God is in me, and He has already overcome my greatest fears, worries, difficulties, and hardships.

As I was studying these verses, marking my Bible, reading aloud, and praying relentlessly, my daily devotional shared similar themes.// I am with you // Clothe your mind in Me // Nothing, including the brightest blessings and the darkest trials, can separate you from Me// In this devotional I found my daily prayer. Holy Spirit, control my thoughts.  

Almost as suddenly as I was attacked, I found the way to combat it. With God. I no longer feel alone, when I'm afraid I'm reminded that my God, who lives in me and fights for me, has already overcome my fear. And everyday, I'm learning to abide in His love. His love that is so much greater than any lie this world tells me. His love that overpowers all my fears and insecurities. His love that keeps me going every single day.

As I continue to prepare to go to Haiti, I am continually attacked. But at the same time, I am continually reminded of how powerful my God is. He loves me, He cares for me, and He fights for me. In an email I received from an amazing, loving, God-fearing woman and mentor of mine, I was encouraged to continue to own my faith. By going to Haiti, I am owning my faith. By willingly going to dark places, spiritual warfare is inevitable. But as one of my best friends reminded me last night, God gives His toughest battles to His strongest soldiers.

So, I ask each one of you to join me in prayer. Prayer that I might continue to grow stronger in my faith amidst the attacks. And prayer for protection, strength, and encouragement. Thank you for the prayers and support. In each struggle, I am reminded of just how blessed I am to have both God and friends who fight for me and with me.

Spiritual warfare is BIG.  But God is so much BIGGER.


Fearlessly His,
       
                   Madi